, , , , , , ,

Concerning moving, Montana, mountains, Banjo Thunder-Toes, and the slugs that have annihilated my arugula.

“Gardening is cheaper than therapy and you get {tomatoes.}”  ~Author Unknown

…well, you would if you planted them. This year I took a slightly different approach with the ol garden, and instead, focused on making it a floral wonderland. We knew we wouldn’t be living on the farm the whole way through harvest, so it made more sense to focus on planting things that would beautify and keep going into the fall for our front yard rather than get consumed by slugs and pass away…which is what happened to my greens last month, sadly. :(  One of these days I want to plant an entire yard full of wildflowers- instead of grass, I mean. I think that would be fantastic. But until then, here’s to small spaces :) And the beloved apple tree that I will miss…

Oh, I just love beautiful things…

Hm…I’ve been trying to write this blog for weeks now, but this is how I work: If I don’t journal first- in my own pilot G2 and paper way, it’s really hard for me to get stuff out up here. My creativity gets all blocked up. Saying that my literary creativity has been blocked up this past month would be the understatement of the season. I actually don’t think I’ve opened my journal since I was pregnant… I suppose there’s a season for everything, and this season didn’t include thoughts I wanted to commit onto paper. No, not angry thoughts or anything, just questions that sounded redundant and lackluster. Being sick for the full month of July has not helped this lackluster outlook, either, and I am aching for new scenery.

Happily, this new scenery is in our very near future!

I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that this season on a small, co-operative farm in Bellingham, Wa, has not been one of the richest and saddest seasons of my life. It has been incredibly rich; as August 6th will mark one year of being more happily married than I could have imagined, and saddest because that day will find us both more weathered than either of us expected to be after such a short time. Oh yes, we came here with big plans and big dreams and dropped them like an anchor into the dark, rich soil of this region. I was going to take root here.

{our next door four-year-old just shouted out into the morning “Daddy- I can’t believe my eyes right now!!” …something about finding an apple on a branch in the yard. Haha! Oh kids… I felt the same way, kind of…just a little more…lackluster, haha!}

So take root we did. We had our five-year plan…seems like we’ve always had one of those…

{How the two of us became one: Park bench, old friends, shared bagel, two futures with lots of question marks, “K, Joel, your life: five-year plan- what do you really want? “….um, you’re kind of my five-year plan…” …um, what?!}

So, since that plan worked out, we tried another one involving Western Washington University, engineering {smartypants}, and living sustainably in community. And then, in 6 short months, a lot of life happened.  We realized that Western wasn’t the right fit for us and the ol’ five-year plan, so we explored the possibility of moving on. Then we got pregnant and let the anchor sink back down. After a sequence of sad events this spring, and the loss of our baby at just over three months, we realized there was no longer anything holding us here.

While I would do anything to have Haven back with us, (we would have been finding out the gender right about now…) we also had this new start on our first year of marriage that doesn’t happen very often and we felt our priorities and desires for this season of our lives shift like a load of bricks in a backpack.

We actually didn’t want to live on the coast at all! And we missed our true community-people you’ve invested years into and just want to “be with.” I missed the sage and the rivers and the Indian Summer away from the coast. I hated the rain and the slugs and the cool, constant weather, and no number of cute walks around the Bellingham Farmer’s Market, berry farms, or bay is going to change that, haha! Maybe it’s because we’re from the other side of the Columbia…it just doesn’t ever “feel” right. Is that a ridiculous reason in itself to move? Not when you have one short life. Not when you’re faced with this season of, “what do you really want-five year plan?” all over again.

So after many cups of coffee, tea, tears, hugs, and late-night conversations in each other’s arms, we decided that what we believe God is gently leading us into, is a season in Bozeman, MT. Surprise! Random, huh? …not so random. We started playing around with the idea of MSU after realizing that Western wasn’t going to be the culmination of Joel’s pursuit towards becoming a mechanical engineer. MSU, however is a top 100 school and has a pretty amazing ME program.  Ok, check. Also, we think Montana is beautiful. Also, Montana happens to be two states closer to Wyoming, Yellowstone Park, and one of my absolute dearest friends and her beloved husband. We used to live together, and oh, how wonderful it would be to have that sister closer to me again…

As the relentless spring rain continued to saturate my SOUL here, haha, Montana was starting to sound pretty great. We didn’t tell our Wyoming friends, though, until we knew for sure it was going to happen. When we got pregnant, I found a wonderful midwife here (Bellingham boasts of many- and an amazing birthing center, FYI), so we decided to delay our plan until next year… It was around then that we told our friends that we were planning an eventual transition east of the Rockies with our new family in tow.  But then we didn’t have that little one anchoring us here anymore, so we decided to uproot sooner. Our beloved Wyoming friends also had news that they had been sitting on as well-

They had also been planning a move to Bozeman!

Emily and I just laughed- of course we were both moving to Bozeman- naturally… :D

So here the month of July finds us all hopeful and feeling a little risky. Sadly, with the move less than a month away on August 15th, I’m fairly horrified to find that the entire month of July seems to have creeped away while I was sick…seriously?

We decided that along with this fresh season east of the mountains, we wanted to move unencumbered by the things of this world, so we’re trying to partially liquidate our lives with a yard sale before we leave. We just have such a strong desire for something new and “other than” this season- it’s been interesting to see how that has manifested in our plans. Simplifying our lives right now is very intentional and includes other big life plans that I’ll save for another entry.

Thanks so much for reading!

sigh…it felt good to write…. :)

Also, a sweet little memoir to our little friend, Jackson, who made the move to Bellingham on the dashboard of our Uhaul and will remain here on the farm after we leave…people, please drive slower through residential areas…such a tiny little thing! Look at his ears!months later, watching us plant the garden. I’m so glad I took this a couple days before. He was such a great cat- look at the stripes on his whiskers, haha! We were also taking pictures to announce that we were pregnant that day. Dumb, huh? That was just a sad season…

About a month after the miscarriage, my sweet husband said he had a surprise for me- his name is Banjo Thunder-Toes and he has brought a sweetness to our summer. He doesn’t replace anything, but he sure adds something new :) And he’s so very small and ridiculous and we love him…I suppose he will find himself on a new dashboard headed out onto a new road himself here in a few weeks… :)

Ah, life…